EST. 2026 · PRE-LAUNCH · DAY 0 TEHTY HELSINGISSÄ · KALLIO KITCHEN · BATCH BC-001 CURING ● JOIN THE LIST · BE FIRST
● DAY 0 · BUILDING IN PUBLIC BC-001 · CURING IN A KALLIO CUPBOARD

DO THE CRIME. DO THE BRINE.

A two-person Finnish pickle company. One jar. One cupboard.
No shop yet. No markets yet. Just brine, building.
FIRST BATCH ESCAPES IN —
000
:
00
:
00
:
00
AUG 01 2026 · 17:00 EEST · 24 JARS · CREW LIST GETS THEM FIRST
JOIN THE CREW LIST
ALREADY ENROLLED
No spam. No newsletter. One email when BC-001 is ready, one email when we get a market stall, that's it.
Unsubscribing is legal. We will not pursue charges.
PRE-LAUNCH · PRE-LAUNCH · PRE-LAUNCH · DAY 0 · BUILDING IN PUBLIC · BUILDING IN PUBLIC · DO THE CRIME · DO THE BRINE ·  
PRE-LAUNCH · PRE-LAUNCH · PRE-LAUNCH · DAY 0 · BUILDING IN PUBLIC · BUILDING IN PUBLIC · DO THE CRIME · DO THE BRINE ·  
FILE BC-2026/00 · STATEMENT OF FACT

Here is what we are not yet.

×
A SHOP
No "Buy Now" button. The button does not exist. The page does not exist. We will not sell you anything today.
×
A MARKET STALL
No Hakaniemi. No Hietalahti. Not yet. We are circling the kauppahalli like very polite vultures.
×
A FACTORY
One kitchen. Two people. 24 jars per batch. Hand-packed, pH-tested, signed for. Hobby-scale by design.
×
IN A HURRY
A pickle takes seven days. A brand takes longer. We are in no rush and neither are the cucumbers.
WHAT WE ARE

Two people in Helsinki, putting cucumbers in jars, building a record from the first jar onward.

EXHIBIT A · THE ONE PRODUCT

THE CLASSIC
CRIMINAL.

BC-001 · 500ML · DILL · 5% ACIDITY

The benchmark. The first offence. The jar that earned us the name. Hand-packed in a Kallio kitchen, pH-tested twice, sealed by Roosa, signed by Ryan.

Dill forward
Balanced acid
Bright snap
Black peppercorn finish
SEE THE JAR →
Available to crew list only · summer 2026 · 24 jars exist
BATCH BC-001 · CURING · DAY 0 · DO THE CRIME · DO THE BRINE ·
BRINE CRIME CO. CLASSIC CRIMINAL LOT · BC-001 · pH 3.72 TEHTY HELSINGISSÄ
BATCH OF 24· pH 3.72· 500ML· HAND-PACKED
LIVE TELEMETRY · CUPBOARD #2 · KALLIO

Status of the cupboard, right now.

UPDATED EVERY TIME ROOSA OPENS THE DOOR
CUPBOARD TEMP
18.2°C
TARGET: 18–22°C · NOMINAL
BATCH pH
3.72
TARGET: 3.5–4.0 · CURING ON SCHEDULE
JARS SEALED
24/24
ZERO LID FAILURES · PERSONAL RECORD
DAYS CURED
04/07
3 DAYS REMAINING · DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR
THE PLAN · NEXT FOUR MOVES

What happens next, in order.

01
NOW
CREW LIST OPENS
This page. You are here. Get on the list, get the first jar.
LIVE
02
JUN 2026
RUOKAVIRASTO REGISTRATION
Elintarvikehuoneisto application is filed. We wait for the inspector.
IN PROGRESS
03
AUG 1 · 17:00
BATCH BC-001 RELEASED
24 jars. Crew list first, then whoever's left. No public sale. No shop.
04
LATE 2026
FIRST MARKET STALL
Hakaniemen kauppahalli, ideally. We are sending polite emails.
PLANNED
SEE FULL LEDGER →
THE TWO ACCOMPLICES

Ryan & Roosa.
One jar between them.

R
RYAN
THE HUSTLE
Words. Markets. Photography. Shows up at Roosa's with cucumbers. Negotiates with cucumbers.
R
ROOSA
THE CRAFT
Recipes. pH. The seal of approval. Helsinki-born, dill-blessed. Says no to garlic, then says yes.
READ THE WHOLE STORY →
LAST CHANCE · FOR NOW

GET ON THE LIST
OR GET LEFT OUT.

24 jars. 247+ accomplices already on the list. The math is the math.

Or: Konami code, anywhere on the site. Try it. ↑↑↓↓←→←→ B A